Pinkies Up: 5 Ways Being Pretentious Ain’t All that Bad

July 28, 2017


I’m not exactly sure when Alex and I became full-on eccentric, but it definitely was sometime in the 8 years between “I do” and “Let’s make a baby.” (Poor Pine has only known us this way.) As we’ve grown closer together, we’ve grown odder together—and for the most part we like it that way.


This eccentricity displays itself in lots of ways: We drive one car, live in 900 sqft, got rid of our TV (I was homeschooled, what do you expect? (thought I should also drop that bomb at some point before we know each other too well and it’s awkward)) and have a weekly Bakery Day (more on that another day).  


But over time, we’ve noticed some of our eccentricities have evolved into pretentiousness. And it ain’t all that bad. Here are 5 ways being secretly snooty has given us a little more sanity.


1. Classical Music

I used to listen to pop hits and news stations, and I was a lot more informed. But you know what, I was also over-stimulated, nervous and weighed down by a lot of stuff I have little to no control over. I need to focus my feeble energy on the things and people that matter in my every day.


So we started listening to classical music most of the time. It’s been so nice to have peaceful background track to our daily struggle.


Full Disclosure: This does lead to making recent statements like “I really like that new Ed Sheeran song”—when referencing Shape of You. But the important stuff you’ll catch through “Herd Immunity”: when your friends all keep up with the latest fashion, news and celebrity gossip—and you get to bum off of their coolness and knowledge.


2. Fresh Flowers

One of my New Year’s resolutions was to keep fresh flowers around the house. So every Friday, we stop by Trader Joe’s and grab a cheapy bundle to throw in a vase or two. Just having fresh flowers makes the whole house feel calmer and brighter. Side bonus: Even when the house is a dirty wreck you feel good because, flowers.


3. Lattes

Just order one—especially an iced lavender latte—and you’ll feel so fancy and pulled together that you’ll float through Costco in your gym clothes feeling like a queen.


4. Reading

Ok, this wasn’t so stark in my mind until I started reading the Harry Potter series this year. (1. Yes, I’m nearly 33 years old and haven’t gotten around to the books. 2. I’ve miraculously stayed in the dark (See Classical Music ;P) for 20 years, so don’t you dare spoil it for me.)


After reading the first two books, we watched the first two movies (which I also hadn’t seen), and while they were fun, the same magic just wasn’t there. There’s so much more detail and context when you dive into a book.


Plus, it forces me to slow down. Reading takes time and that can be a good thing. So far this year, I've read 7 books (which is like 700 for me), and it’s helped me relax and even sleep better.


5. Sparkling Water

Hi, my name is Sally, and I am a Dr Pepper addict. After 30 years of rehab and relapse, I broke free from the unhealthy, yet delicious, nectar of my home state. The cure: The one-two punch of sparkling water and unsweet iced tea. Caffeine and bubbles, baby—that’s all it took. A 30-pack of Topo Chico is on our weekly Costco list (See Lattes).


What pretentious things do you secretly do and love? Let me know in the comments!

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